How can I truly move on from the past? I want to stop dwelling in the past? I remember her/him all the time and this gets me very angry? Is there a way I can get her/him off my head? A friend of mine threw all those questions at me all at once. However, I had to answer those with the experience I’ve had with such events from my past and how I stopped dwelling in it and move on. He said he wants to stop dwelling in the past, how could he actualize it.
We all have past that has been handled differently it doesn’t matter what approach we’ve taken before finally forgetting all what the past had on us. Many people out there still live in the good old days, when flowers were blooming however this mindset took a large toll on such people. There are moments of ups and downs in our lives but standing firm and moving on is what is going to keep smiles on your face in the long run. Tear yourself away from the past, just build a stronger mindset and keep moving forward in life.
Here are simple advises to help you stop dwelling in the past:
The past is the past:
The present is present and the past is the past unless scientists have invented the “time travel machine” that could take you back in time. Stop living in the era of the past and start living in the present. You can’t alter all the mistakes you’ve done in the past but can only take positive from mistakes made. “Dwelling in the past is like moving forward with your back facing the front, you shall always miss out on what’s in front of you”. In your course to stop dwelling in the past, your best hit is total eradication and formatting of your negative past lives.
Stop blaming yourself:
Blaming yourself for all that has happened won’t help either, I understand the fact that criticizing yourself sometimes for silly mistakes that were done is a good way to say. I could have done it better or this could have been a perfect way to go about it. Here’s the deal, no one is above mistakes, and life accommodates us differently in various manner. Yeah, you could have made a very big mistake from your past. You just have to forget, stop blaming yourself for it even if you deserved the blaming, forgive yourself and move on.
Stay away from your X:
Always ensure you are far away from him/her as much as possible. Relationship breakups are very difficult to overcome if there isn’t a distance between you both. You see him along the street, workplace, school so often – seeing him will always ignite those thoughts of him/her, those lost memories of you. Distancing yourself away for a while could help you tremendously to stop dwelling in the past.
He/she could have done something very wrong during your time together, it’s ideal you summon the courage to let go. Forgiveness would bring mutual understand and reunion, it simply makes you overcome the very past by putting things behind you. Learn to forgive even when a person deserves the opposite. Build a forgiving spirit and see how different your life is going to be.
I gave other advice such as…
- Getting a new hobby; get away from things that make you remember him/her often. Hobbies, interest, places and lots more. Do away with those particular things and see how it shall help you in overcoming the past.
- Always see the positive in everything; don’t always feel too battered about how your life is or how it had become. See the positive side of it and ensure to make the most of your life.
- You have to stop thinking about him, what is gone is gone for good. Why have a positive thought of what is never going to be yours again? Moving on is the surest odds to stop dwelling in the past of your ex-love.
“The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present”.
Don’t allow yourself to be controlled by events of the past. The only positive I see from the past does rely on your ability to learn from it and be a better person altogether. “The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present”. So stop dwelling in the past cause there is really nothing to gain from hanging on to irrelevant memories, drop them and see your life change for good.